Palo Alto Joe

Palo Alto Joe Index CoderInvasion of the EnglishLanguage

While PaloAltoJoe has previously identified the Coder as one of SiliconValley's four powerJob types (along with Splicers, Geeks and Weenies) I have left unexamined the recent influence of Coders on the highlyMaleable EnglishLanguage.

Many may not have yet taken notice of thisInfluence. It began as Coders influenced Weenies in the MarketingDepartments of bigComputerAndSoftwareCompanies. Products were released with names like PowerBook, JavaStation, SmartSuite, QuickTime, EtherLink and LotusScript. The fad caught on and now even corporations have changed the spellings of theirNames to things like SiliconGraphics, RadioShack, AutoNation and DreamWorks.

But the trend in CapitalAssistedWordCombinatorics has not been limited to ComputerRelatedCompaniesAndProducts. PaloAltoJoe brushes his teeth with PeroxiCare, keeps his lawn green with LawnCare, and attends theatre at PaloAlto's TheatreWorks.

Trancending products and institutions, people's names are now WhiteSpaceImmune. ESPN, MTV and even some localTVStations now display names like JOHNMADDEN, MADONNA and ANNACHAVEZ. YuppieSheep parents, eager to jump on any BandWagon, have named theirChildren things like JonBenet Ramsey. Of course the tradition of NoSpaceMultiCapNames dates back to old MacDonald, but the old ScotsMan probably didn't spell hisName that way because hisCompiler wouldn't recognize Mac Donald as a singleVariable. And he certainly DidNotSpellIt that way because www.Mac donald.com is not a valid DomainName.

No, the TrueHistory of RidiculousWordConcatonation comes from the very roots of our MotherTongue. The GermanLanguage puts to shame our newFound propensity for StringingThingsTogetherLikeThis. The mother tongue has long heldInEsteem such words as WeiberFastNachtKarnevalsSauffetenLaune (caps mine) which means NightOfTheCrazyWomenAtTheDrunkenMardiGrasParty - a bit more descriptive than FatTuesday, don't you think? Another famous German "word" is DonauDampfSchiffsTagesFahrtKapitain which roughly translates to TheGuyWithTheBeerAndSausageInHisMouthWhoDrivesTheDailySteamshipAcrossTheDanube. In English something spelled in TheStyleOfWordsHavingSex is viewed as more hip or high-tech. In German, even the lowly expiration date on a carton of milk is known as the LebensMittelHaltbarkeitVerfallsDatum and every can of soda has a SpruedelFlaschenDeckenGummiDichtung.

While the Germans may be masters of MakingWordsActLikeRailroadCars, it wasn't until the birth of the SiliconValleyCoder that English adopted and improved this practice by capitalizing the first letter of eachAppendedWord. PaloAltoJoe would like to celebrate this bold display of CoderPower, but I ask OneQuestion. In the Year2007, will we have invitations to NintiesParties where the Invitations will be written like thisArticle and meant as a joke to celebrate NinetiesHumor? "Come to our NinetiesCelebrationFest!" Or in the Year2007 will residents of PaloAlto, MountainView and SanFrancisco long for the goodOldDays when English spelling was funny, but the printed language was OtherwiseLegible?

NexT wEEk, pALoaLTojOE reVEaLs The AnSWeR tO tHe quEsTioN oF wHiCh fAILeD eNgLisH MaJoR tUrneD mARkeTer Is iN CHaRge of cApItaLiZaTIoN aT eSpN2 and mTv and hOw dO tHeY dEciDe wHicH letTerS gEt tO sTanD taLLeR tHan tHeiR nEiGhBORs.